Flashback to 1989...An excerpt from my diary

Being in Berlin has made me think a lot about the time I came here when the wall was coming down with my friends, Shannon and Randall. My daughter, Kathleen, has been home in Charleston for a couple of weeks so I asked her to go up into the attic and try and find my diary from 1989. Low and behold, she found it. She took pictures of all of the pages referencing our Berlin trip and sent them to me.

This morning, I transcribed my curly cue handwriting from the diary pages captured by Kathleen on her iPhone and put them into a Google doc. What I said and how I said it, made me laugh. I kept all of the underlines and exclamation points. It is interesting to look back on my 21 year old self.

I thought I would share it here. Basically, the back story is, we were studying and living in Paris. It was my Senior year of college. We had been reading (in the actual newspapers) about the fall of the Berlin Wall. So, Randall, Shannon and I got on a train and went to Berlin....

"November 17, 1989

I can’t even begin to describe how neat today was. What a cultural experience. I’m tired right now so will go into more later but…highlights! We walked for two miles the wrong way today in search of the wall. While Shannon went into a store to ask directions, Randall and I stood outside and looked at the map. This woman came up to us with her daughter and started talking to us in German. We said we didn’t speak German, so she spoke in broken English. She said (after we asked) that she was from East Berlin. She was so happy. She said the biggest difference was that East Germany was all black and white and West Berlin was so colorful. It was so neat. We congratulated her, etc. and took a picture with her. All of the East Germans are so happy. You can see their awe in their faces on the streets.

After a huge hike, we found the wall. Talked to the CUTE boys, one especially cute German. Soldiers were on the wall. Lots of graffiti. Lots of people standing around. Taking pictures. Singing. Drinking gluhwein and beer. There were lots of cameras - news I guess. We walked a little bit down the wall and people were chipping away at it with screwdrivers and hammers. In the dark!! It was so cold so we decided to go find a place to stay. Our feet were numb. At the train station, they said to come to this youth hostel. It’s practically in Egypt or Siberia because of the weather but it’s clean, comfortable and cheap. Randall and I just went to the deserted twilight zone train station to get something to eat. Good convo and soaked up some more culture. How neat to be here.

November 19, 1989

Shannon, Randall and I are on the train from Cologne to Brussels. It’s Sunday around noon. We took a train out of Berlin last night. It was supposed to leave at 11.30pm, but it was an hour late, so we missed our train from Cologne to Paris. We got to have breakfast and see the Cologne Cathedral, though. It was well deserved after the freezer compartment on the train to hell and back. Details of yesterday…

We got up and Shannon and I had breakfast with this complete vagabond who was rummaging thru leftover food on the tables. Good start. Then we took the train into Berlin, put stuff away, got money and went hardware shopping at this huge department store.Bought three hammers and a package of chisels, a whole tool chest! Anyway - Diversion… We took the train to Dusselforf instead of Brussels. We were sitting on the tracks for an awfully long time and realized something was up. We had been going the wrong direction. So, we’re on the way back to Cologne on the same train. Then, we’ll deal with how to get back to Paris. How typical. So, back to the Berlin stories…

We took the metro to East Berlin to walk around, see the wall, start chipping. When we got to the East German metro station, I realized I didn’t have my passport. In fact, no ID! I was a woman without a country in a communist one. So, we headed immediately back to the train station to get my stuff out of the locker. I was dying on the train back because we didn’t have tickets either!! We ate some lunch around the station and then hunted down bus #29 to Checkpoint Charlie. The museum was great. Lots of art that I didn’t remember. It was really crowded. Shannon and I waited outside for Randall. Lots of people wandering around, pictures galore. Cameras clicking away.

There was a spirit of celebration - a circus. The allied guards at the checkpoint were beaming. People leaving East Berlin in their small, two horse power cars were smiling and had eyes full of wonder. People - West Germans and others - were giving flowers to East Germans in cars. One woman took a picture of an East German family with their passports. We all got caught up in the spirit of photos and people watching. We eventually started chiseling the wall. We helped bring it down. This nice older man from Boston helped us and got a few chunks. Everyone was watching us. People took our pictures. People borrowed our tools and had their pictures taken. A guard came up to me and told me I wasn’t allowed to hit the wall - I was horrified but he had a sense of humor and kept hassling us.

We decided to go into East Berlin - brave the line and the elements. We ended up selling a hammer and chisel to the man from Boston. Made a small profit. Stood in line for an hour and a half or two to go thru the border. Had a couple of beers and rapped with these guys from Amersterdam. We had to change 25DM for 25 East German marks and we headed into a communist country.

It is really pretty - pretty, old buildings, very clean. Well organized. Idealistic one could say. The stores were all closed, but the windows were decorated with food - all German - clothes, etc. Even a tux and formal shop. We passed a few cafes that were open, a couple of restaurants with long lines. We walked around. Not many people. Probably all tourists. Not colorful or lively. Very quiet. Only one type of car. Oh, the money’s different too - like plastic. We tried to go eat at a few places but no luck. We finally stopped at a place called Hog Restaurant. Nice. And waited an hour to an hour and a half to be seated. Dinner was good - chicken, french fries and wine. We spent all of our money at least. Then we booked back to the border and took the bus to the train station.

Our train was delayed so we hung out - discussed if sign language was in different languages or not. Never decided. I’m so glad I went to Berlin and was part of this historical event. I’m so aware of what is going on. So interested in the history and future of world events. When you see and talk to the people, it’s overwhelming. Everyone wanted us to bring back a piece of the wall for them, but they won’t understand what it was like. Couldn’t experience the enthusiasm - feel the momentum of the city. We kept wondering if people were East German. The people who had bags full of fruit were dead giveaways. But everyone looked so happy. They have freedom now.

Shannon asked last night why they would be bummed to be over in East Berlin. It is beautiful - to us anyway last night - the buildings, etc. But those people have a wall between them and freedom, opportunity and motivation. They have - or had - nothing to work towards. They had a job, assured of a living - but no goals because they lacked freedom. Now they’ve been granted it. They can freely travel to the West. They can live there, work there, have families there. At least now they have a choice. A right to make their own decisions about their future.

Those little pieces of the Berlin Wall in my backpack symbolize more than one of the most famous structures in the world - they represent a physical and psychological force that has been forced upon a country. It has divided family, friends and countrymen for 28 years. It is the cause for the end of many lives. For the ending of love. For the ending of a country that was once unified. But it never dwindled the hope of the German people, East and West, and all of those in the capitalist world who believed that it was wrong. Piece by piece, chip by chip, the wall is coming down. It may take a day, a weekend, a week, months or even years for it to be leveled, but everyone will always remember it. The changes are phenomenal."